Is it About You?
As we are well into the second month of the year where gyms are getting less crowded and 50% of my peers are doing dry winter, I began to reflect on how much all of us are absorbed in ourselves (including me). For example, I know a female in her mid-thirty’s who is married, has an excellent job, a house in New England and an apartment in DC. Sends her dog to playschool every day, travels the world for work and pleasure and has a wonderful family but cannot get enough of whatever she is looking for. As a result, she continues to be self-absorbed with appearance, health, and status. It is a never-ending cycle that does not satisfy and leads to doing more at the expense of joy and meaningful experiences.
As society tells us to focus on ourselves through diet/nutrition, exercise, and meaningful relationships we all fall into the trap of “go be you,” “you deserve it,” “you are great,” “life is short, have fun.” Yet, I see those who have a bigger purpose other than themselves are happier and more fulfilled. Their purpose may be caring for others, having to work hard to simply put food on the table, working in a job where society is dependent on them, caring for others, or simply putting God first in their lives. It is any purpose where it is not about you and what you receive from your experiences.
As I am wildly focused on health, I can become too self-absorbed and then everything becomes about me. It is about me when I have conversations with loved ones. It is about me when I am alone or living life and of course God, forbid I get inconvenienced 😊. In 2024, I was in London walking down the airport terminal to my gate in August when they closed off the terminal before my gate, so passengers who were deplaning could cross our terminal into customs. As I was waiting for more than a minute, I was able to make eye contact with the attendant and gave her a look that said, “let’s go.” A few minutes later she let us through and as I walked to my gate with time to spare, I realized that I must have looked like an impatient entitled snob where the universe revolved around me. I was embarrassed by my actions due to my self-absorption. When it is about others, I have found one is happier, nicer and more patient. In addition to simply being grateful for whatever God has given us.
For me, I will pledge to put purpose in everything I do where the benefit is not to me but for someone else. If I want to be healthier it is for my family and not for my vanity. If I seek more spirituality, it is so I can be better when supporting and helping others. Find purpose in your life that is more than just you. In this beautiful world we live in, believe it or not, we were happier 30 years ago than we are today.
